my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
