Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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