me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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