I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
