Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
