are you so shy because you have an std?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
