Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
