I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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