So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
