I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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