I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
