She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
