he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
