3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
