I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
