Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize