great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
