If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Houston, we have a blender
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
