I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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