why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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