I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Even the bartender felt bad for me
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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