elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
