You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize