did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
