I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize