you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
