question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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