I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
