i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
