HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
There's always time for handjobs
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
