Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
