We're facebook friends in real life
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
