Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize