Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
