Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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