he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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