She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
then he tried to convert me to islam
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize