You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
