Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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