at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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