the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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