He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
