i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
