Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
