i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
