"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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