Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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