Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize
