Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I just forgot I was standing up.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
