Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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